Why Should I Go to Church If I Can Pray at Home?

Deacon Garo Balian

Jerusalem Armenian Church

“Why should I go to church? I can pray on my couch. I can kneel in my room and talk to God. Didn’t Jesus say, ‘Go into your room and shut the door and pray in secret’? Why do we keep insisting on church attendance?”

These are questions many people think about, especially today. Sometimes, in a light and friendly way, I’ll ask close friends or family, “Hey, we missed you at church today—where were you?” I’m not trying to pressure anyone or make them feel guilty. It’s just a way of saying: you matter.

The answers I hear are often thoughtful and sincere: “I can pray at home." “I didn’t understand the language." “I feel disconnected.”

These aren’t excuses. They’re reflections. And they deserve honest answers, not judgment. After some prayer and thinking, I came to believe this: the church is not just a building. It’s a relationship. And relationships need presence.

1. God Is Everywhere—but the Church Is Where We Meet Him Together

Yes, God is present everywhere—in our homes, in nature, in silence. But God has always chosen specific places to meet His people: Mount Sinai, the burning bush, the Temple in Jerusalem, and the Upper Room at Pentecost. In the same way, Christ established His Church as the place where we meet Him together.

When we go to church, we’re not just visiting a holy place. We’re responding to a divine invitation.

“For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them” (Matthew 18:20 NRSV).

“They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers” (Acts 2:42).

2. It’s a Relationship, Not a Religious Obligation

Think about your closest friend, or someone you’re dating or married to. If you only talk once a year, can that relationship really grow?

Going to church once a year on Easter or Christmas is like texting “Happy Birthday” to someone you haven’t seen in years and calling it a friendship. It might keep the connection alive, but it won’t grow.

The same is true with God. If we want to feel His presence in our lives—not just when we’re in trouble, but every day—we need to be present to Him consistently. The church is where that presence becomes real in Word, Sacrament, and Community.

3. Yes, Sometimes We Don’t Understand

This is especially true in churches like mine, where the service is in Armenian. Many people say, “I don’t understand the language.”That’s a real concern. But the answer isn’t to stay away—it’s to go deeper.

Many churches today are working on bilingual services, offering explanations, and helping young people learn. Ask questions. Stay after. Read. Don’t walk away just because it’s difficult. A real relationship grows through struggle, not through avoidance.

Think of how often we misunderstand the people we love, but we keep coming back. That’s how our relationship with the Church should be. It’s not about perfect understanding, but faithful presence.

4. You Can’t Receive the Sacraments on Your Couch

We can and should pray at home—Jesus tells us to do so:

“But whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you” (Matthew 6:6). 

But private prayer cannot replace the sacraments.

In the Armenian Apostolic Church—as in all ancient apostolic traditions—we believe that in the Divine Liturgy (Badarak), we receive the Body and Blood of Christ. This is not just symbolic—it’s a divine mystery. You cannot livestream communion. You cannot download absolution. God desires to give us grace in person, through the hands of the Church.

“Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you” (John 6:53).

5. Church Is Not a Performance—It’s a Family

Some people say, “I didn’t get anything out of church today.”But we don’t go to church just to be entertained or inspired—we go to worship.

We go to give ourselves to God: our time, our prayers, our presence. We go to support one another, even when we don’t feel like it. Church teaches us how to live in humility, patience, and love.

And just like in any family, we don’t always agree or understand. But we stay together and grow. The Church is not a perfect institution. It’s the Body of Christ—a body made up of struggling, growing people.

6. You Belong Here

Finally, you matter to the Church. When you’re not there, something is missing.

“Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it” (1 Corinthians 12:27).

You might think no one notices—but God notices. He sees your longing, your efforts, your struggles. And He’s waiting to meet you in the place where His people gather—His Church.

Don’t give up on church. Don’t give up on your relationship with God. Come as you are. Come with your questions. Come with your doubts. But come.

You’re not coming because the Church is perfect. You’re coming because God is present. Not just in the quiet of your room, but also in the gathered Body of Christ, where the Word is preached, the Sacraments are celebrated, and the people of God are formed.